how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Randomize
