You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
