so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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