Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches

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(662): View more from Mississippi

When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.

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(727): View more from Florida

If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.

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(937): View more from Ohio

the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(205): View more from Alabama

I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed

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(301): View more from Maryland

Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?

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(252): View more from North Carolina

We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it

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(607): View more from New York

WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"

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(440): View more from Ohio

Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family

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