you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
