Apparently you make a good broom.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
