anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Randomize
