thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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