you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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