In the future we'll all be gay
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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