Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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