He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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