In the future we'll all be gay
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
