so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
