I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
