Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
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