he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Success! We fucked roommates!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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