So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize
