He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
