let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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