Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Randomize
