does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Randomize
