chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
