My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
