But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize