Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
