I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Randomize
