So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Randomize
