someone owes me an orgasm
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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