i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Everything about him screamed your future.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Randomize
