Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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