I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize