he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
