I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize
