it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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