I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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