WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
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you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
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Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
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