my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize