i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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