when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
operation have a gay friend backfired
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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