i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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