physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
