Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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