My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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