I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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