Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
NoShamevember. You game?
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
