After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
