I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
