we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize