No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
